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30 Things a Cambridge local knows

December 22nd, 2018


Punting in Cambridge 6

  1. Your first nightclub was known to you as either Cindy’s, Filth or Ballare. Dispite what you had been told, you were disappointed to find that there were actually no girls waiting to pull you into the toilets.


  1. Childhood birthday parties were spent either at Wimpy bar or in Lazer Quest


  1. As a teenager you had your first drink on Parkers Piece


  1. Cherryhinton hall was where interschool rumbles were staged. The kids would endlessly discuss their choice of weapon, but no rumbles ever actually took place.


  1. The regal is where you go for cheap drinks.


  1. Quayside is where you spend long summer evenings.


  1. Your fed up of being asked if you want to go punting in Cambridge, except in the summer when you actually decide to go.


  1. As a teenager you thought it was cool to shop in Cult Clothing.


  1. “Warning, till 6 in the morning”


  1. Your parents took you to Wimpole hall or Wandleberry for knackering long hikes. You would much rather have stayed home and watched TV.


  1. The Terminator ride at the Midsummer common was what you longed and prayed for.


  1. Wardrobe is where you go for your Halloween costume.


  1. Your favourite thing about Linton zoo was the foul mouthed Minor birds who told your mother where to go.


14. You would like people to think that you shop in John Lewis, but your more likely to sneak into B&M.


15.  Fitzwilliam museum was a regular school trip venue. You find the Armoury and Mummy section fascinating, but wish there was less crockery and renaissance paintings.


16. In the days before broadband, Central library is where you went to use the amazing new dial up internet.


17. Chalk pits is where you destroyed your dads racing bike.


18. Cambridge is very flat, so when it snows everyone assembles at the one hill in Netherhall School.


19. You used to cycle everywhere, including “Filth”. This was particularly unpleasant as you didn’t wear a coat in order to economise of the £1 cloakroom fee. Keeping your hair from looking wind              swept was also difficult, even with half a tin of Dax.


20. At 3am you head to Macdonalds for your drinking food. Alternatively, if your feeling healthy, you walk the extra few steps to Gardenia’s where you try to identify friends in the polaroid                           pictures.


  1. Great St Mary’s church is where you can go to see an amazing panoramic view of the historic city centre.


  1. The best place to have mulled wine is in the fort St. George in front of an open fire


  1. The best cinema seats are at View in the Grafton


  1. A boring shopping trip with your mum was made bearable with a trip to the Market pick and mix.


  1. Mill road is where you go for a haircut, artisan restaurants or a tin of polish beer at 1am.


  1. You learnt to drive on the roads around Morley School, but the hardest part was understanding the virtual driving machine in BSM.


  1. Geeks went to hills road, cool kids went to long road and road men attended CRC.


28. Corn exchange is where you saw your first pantomime and went to your first proper gig.


29.  You could never understand why your Mother wouldn’t buy you an airgun from Bowes and Co.


30. When your feeling cultured you go for a shisha on Mill rd, and wonder what mysterious circumstances led to the closure of Jaffa-net.